Aging Gracelessly

I turned 31 last week. It would have been no big deal except for the epiphany that I had. It dawned on me rather suddenly that I am 31, married, 2 kids ages 5 and 6, job, mortgage. I am grown up (more or less).

I am no longer allowed to make life changing decisions at the drop of a hat. I can no longer decide to move to another city or get a new job just for a change of scenery (Not that I did this alot before, but it was always at least a possibility). I can no longer stay awake until the wee hours of the morning with no consequences. I no longer possess an iron stomach. I can't eat enormous volumes of food anymore without severe gastrointestinally related punishment.

I can't waste all my income on entertainment and toys anymore. I have to fix the car, fix the sprinklers, buy a kitchen appliance. I can't take a vacation or even a day off on a whim anymore. Everything has to be planned, I have a work schedule, my wife has a work schedule, the kids have school schedules.

I have to mow the lawn and plant flowers. I don't like flowers.

I don't get to spend my Saturday's playing videogames and watching or playing endless hours of football and basketball.

As I said, I can no longer stay awake until 2am without consequences, but even sadder, I can no longer even sleep in until 9 or 10am without consequences.

With this realization that I am no longer a twenty-something, do I:
1. Rage, rage against the dying of the light?
2. Just lay down and take a nap?

Posting under protest

I was recently called out for failing to post more often. I was quick to point out that the title of this blog indicates that my failing to post is to be expected. However, the guilt trip worked, so here I am.

Things that are wrong:

Throwing rocks at squirrels.
Laughing at children when they make mistakes.
Trying to hit bicyclists with your car.
Giving tricks instead of treats.
Making fun of vegetarians and hippies.
Passing gas on crowded elevators.
Laughing at people who are self-conscious.
Throwing stuff at nerds.
Making rude noises in Movie Theaters.
Stealing presents at wedding receptions.
Never signalling the direction that you intend to turn.
Kicking small animals over high fences.
Stealing lunchboxes from children.

Can anyone else think of other things that are wrong?